It all came crashing down

The past few months, my email inbox and phone text messages have been buzzing with appointment reminders from the optometrist, dentist, primary care doctor, gynecologist—and now health screenings for cancer.

Today, for instance, a Cologuard rep called me to remind me to complete my colorectal cancer home screening kit.

It initially triggered my anxiety, but the rep was so kind that I felt the tension lifting from my body, and I ended up sharing with her my anxieties.

“I just recently turned 45, and it seems like now I have to do a lot of health screenings,” I said to the Cologuard rep. “It’s a bit overwhelming, if I’m being honest.”

“Ahh yes,” she said to me. She said she completely understood how I was feeling.

“It just feels like it all came crashing down, doesn’t it?”

We both laughed, and I replied, “Yes! That is EXACTLY how it feels—it feels like it’s all crashing down on me.”

The rep was very compassionate and shared a way I can reframe my anxious thoughts on the health screenings.

She encouraged me to look at it like this: I’m simply taking good care of my health by getting routine preventive care. She reminded me that screenings can catch things early—before they become serious.

I didn’t mean to unload my heavy feelings onto a complete stranger 😆, but I am thankful for her kindness and helping me out!


“Cast your care upon the LORD, who will give you support. He will never allow the righteous to stumble.” Psalm 55:23

The Day I Bought My First Fancy Toothbrush

You know you’re an adult when you spend over $60 on a fancy toothbrush and power flosser!

Today, at the dentist office, I decided to splurge a little and purchase the Phillips Sonicare toothbrush and power flosser.

It’s the first time I have ever spent this much on a toothbrush! 😲

Not me getting excited about a pressure sensor. 😂🪥🦷
If I’m doing this, I’m doing it ALL the way! 😄

This is what self-care looks like in your 40s. 😌🦷😂 And I gotta say—I like it!

There was a time I wouldn’t have thought twice about a purchase like this. My parents and older kids gifted me birthday money, and I was considering getting another tattoo (I have 17 tattoos, so far. 😊).

But instead, I asked myself what’s something I can get for myself that can help improve my health? 🤔

Zaya thought this big mouth model was so cool.
Zaya brushing the teeth on the mouth model.

Zaya (5) and Zephaniah (8) had a dentist appointment today, and while I was sitting with the kids in the exam room, I saw the Sonicare toothbrush and power flosser.

That’s it! 💡— I thought to myself.

$140 on my HSA card (and even having an HSA makes me feel super grownup 😝😂)! I’d say this fancy toothbrush and water pick is a very responsible purchase than my getting a tattoo (even though I still really want one! Ha!). 😉


“A joyful heart is the health of the body,but a depressed spirit dries up the bones.” Proverbs 17:22

All images in this blog post are my own photography. If you’d like to use a photo, please contact me first for permission. Thank you!

The Day I Restarted My Walking Routine

Today, I finally made it to the local indoor track to go walking. It felt good to get back to my exercise routine. I got off track with it a few months ago, breaking my 3-year streak of daily walking. 🫤

Why? Oh, because…life! Things have been seriously so busy since the fall.

It’s true what they say when you stop habitually exercising—you start to feel strange.

I have felt kind of off these past three months because I haven’t been walking consistently. I even gained a little weight. 😫

It felt good to get back to my exercise routine of low-impact walking!

About a week ago, I brought up my weight gain to my doctor. Feeling kind of embarrassed, I said to her, “I know I need to lose a little weight.”

But her response to me really surprised to me. She said what matters is I am healthy and I am doing good with my health.

That made me feel good. I thought to myself, Maybe I’m not doing so bad after all!

We can be our own worst critic, unfortunately. I know I can be pretty hard on myself about so many things.

I do feel proud of myself that my annual checkup results showed I am in good health. I was very anxious about that, as I have a fear of doctors and hospitals because of a past medical trauma I experienced when I was pregnant in 2020.

I’m easing back into my daily walking routine, and I will continue to focus on taking good care of my health.

And I will remember to be gentle with myself—because after all, it is okay to start over again.